April 26, 2023 – John 18
When Jesus was taken away from the Garden of Gethsemane to be arrested and crucified, Peter and his disciples basically tried to hide. But before he could truly disappear, Peter was confronted three times by people accusing him of being one of Jesus’s followers. Each time Peter vigorously denied the charges, claiming he never knew Jesus. When the rooster crowed, Peter remembered Jesus’s prediction that he would betray him, and guilt and shame overcame him.
Jesus was well aware of Peter’s denial, and he wanted to meet with him after the resurrection to restore their relationship. In their very poignant conversation, Jesus asks Peter the same question three times to help him deal with his shame. “Peter, do you love me?” Peter, do you love me?" This whole sequence is rather confusing unless we look deeper.
In our English language, the word for love is so widespread it often becomes meaningless. We love God, but we love ice cream, we love our sports team, we love our family members, we love chocolate. All the same word. The Greek language, which is the language of the New Testament, had three words for love: “Philia,” which means “brotherly or sisterly love,’ “Eros,” which means erotic or romantic love, and “Agape,” which means Christ-like, unconditional love.
Let’s revisit the three questions of Jesus using Greek words. Jesus says to Peter, “Peter, do you love me (agape)? Peter responds, “Lord, you know that I love you (philia).” That is not what Jesus wants to hear. A second question from Jesus, “Peter, do you love me (agape),” Again, Peter’s response is, “You know I love you “philia.” A third time Jesus asks, Peter do you love me (philia),” and Peter answers again, “Lord, you know that I love you (philia.).”
Jesus wanted Peter to be able to accept his “agape” for him and to respond in kind. But Peter was not ready to do that, so Jesus finally only asks that Peter “Philia” him. Eventually, Peter gets there, and we learn that he was eventually killed for his unconditional love of Jesus.
Jesus asks of us, “Do you love me (agape).” We may not be able to respond to that, but we might just be able to say with Peter, Lord, you know that I love you (philia). But my prayer is that I will be transformed by the power of the Holy Spirit so that I might be able to truly say, Lord, you know that I love you (agape). And my goal is that I love you with all of my heart, soul, mind and strength and my neighbor as myself.”
Questions for reflection:
- Are "Facebook friends" Philia, Eros or Agape friends?
- Where do you see evidence of agape love in our world?
- What does a church look like where agape love is widespread?